Baby Sunshine – that should be this embryo’s name. It’s only February, but the moment we had our embryo transfer, the weather turned glorious.

It was a bright morning when Jo and I tested at home for the very first time, standing in the sunny bathroom, taking shaky breaths as two lines appeared on the test almost immediately.

It was a gorgeous afternoon, people sitting outside on the terraces, when I nervously walked to the doctors to get my blood drawn. And it was brilliant day when I received the cheery text from the doctor telling me officially and it became real.

I am PREGNANT!

Only four weeks and two days along today, which is of course incredibly early. So much can go wrong still, and it very well might, but I want to enjoy this. I want to treasure every moment of this pregnancy, this dream, for however long we might have it.

We already love you, little Sunshine. Please grow and stay with us.

Love,

your mums xx

It’s a beautiful morning in London. It startlingly feels like spring even though it’s only February.

We slowly make our way towards St. Paul’s cathedral. I promised my grandmother we would go in, so we do, and I even think a little prayer. Neither Jo or myself are religious at all, but on a day like this I feel like we can go with a ‘just in case’, right?

We find the Create clinic (which is just opposite St. Paul’s), and we are checked in quickly. Both of us need to change into gowns, which is a bit like playing dress-up, and we giggle nervously trying to sort out various straps and the plastic bits that go over our feet and heads.

Then the nurse scans my abdomen to check whether my bladder is full enough for the procedure. …and it isn’t!(I’m sorry! I was nervous! I had to have a pee!)

She sends me back to drink more water, so Jo and I sit in the little curtained off area and wait. We take some pictures. We chat. I drink my cups of water.

Back when we heard how many embryos we had, we nicknamed them all. The one they’re transferring today is a 4AB embryo, named ‘Shiva’ by Jo. We ask the nurse whether there will be a chance to get a picture of little Shiva, and she brings it to us, a print-off of this round, cellular blastocyst. It looks nothing like a baby of course, but I love the thought that it might become one some day and showing them the earliest picture ever taken of them * g *

Eventually, I am called back in, scanned again, and my bladder is declared full enough to start.

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